Tag Archives: Man/Boy

The nest is thinning

It’s moving day.

I’m not the one moving, but I am, of course, the one packing. In just a few short hours Man/Boy – er, Justin – will be moving into his first apartment. We’ve worked on a budget, done a little pre-moving shopping (“Yes, I do think it’s a good idea to get a can opener … and hangers … and a garbage can.”) and have all the utilities switched over to either his name or his roommate’s.

Yet here we are, day of the Big Move, and there are still piles of dirty clothes, empty boxes and a countertop filled with things to be packed.

I interrupted a game of something-or-other on Xbox last night to ask Justin if it was time to pack.

“Eh,” he says.

“Should we get all of your clothes and towels and dishes and start putting them in these boxes, or are you going to just take things to the apartment by the armload?”

“That last one, that’s how I’m going to move.”

Of course it is.

Fortunately he’s not moving far. And by “not moving far” I mean he’s moving into the next apartment building. We could look out our respective living room windows and wave – or stick our heads out and have a conversation. Yeah. That close.

This morning, as he’s at a training conference for work, I’m packing. And doing laundry. And washing the new silverware and cooking utensils.

Given this somewhat disorganized method of moving, I can’t help but wonder – because I am a Mom, after all – how he’s going to do. Yes, he’ll be close, but that’s just geography and circumstance. It’s a decent apartment at a decent price – good enough for a first place. I have no doubts that this is just as much the “changing of an era” as it would be if he’d moved across town or even across the state. We’ll run into each other in the parking lot, he’ll occasionally come over to sit with the dogs – but for all intents and purposes, he’s moving out.

Will he know how to load the dishwasher or will he let a disgusting pile of dishes pile up? Will he remember to pay his bills on time? Will he and his roommate get along?

It’s a bittersweet day for me. I’ve been responsible for his care and well-being for more than 20 years if you count the time I was taking care of myself while he was waiting to be born. I’ve applied Band-aids, helped with homework, held his hand to cross the street and celebrated his victories.

But I’d be lying if I said there were a few things I won’t miss: the new roll of toilet paper put on top of the empty roll; the breakfast/lunch/dinner dishes sometimes rinsed out placed on the counter, even when the dishwasher is empty; the giant bags of cereal on the kitchen counter (because 2 minutes after getting it out he’s forgotten where it goes?); and the piles of dirty clothes and empty Diet Mountain Dew bottles on the living room floor.

He’ll be fine. And if he needs me, I’m just a sidewalk away.

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Lessons for the kids as they prepare to leave

In less than six months, I’ll be sending the 17-year-old Man/Boy out into the real world. His sister, just three years younger, will be leaving in what will seem like very short order.

I wonder how well prepared they will be.

Sure, they’re learning financial responsibility (“Just ask Mom, she’ll get it.”) and how to care for a household (“Mom! I need clean jeans!”), but just how ready will they really be?

With that in mind, I thought I’d put together a guide for some of the really, truly important things they will need to know when I’m not there.

1. Ice: Don’t go out and buy it unless you’re having a picnic or a lot of people over. For everyday use – and you may want to clip this recipe – just follow these easy-to-understand instructions: a) Empty ice trays into ice basin in freezer and let thaw; b) fill empty trays with cold water; c) carefully place filled trays into freezer without spilling into the newly-filled ice basin. Let sit for 3-5 hours. Repeat.

2. Toilet paper: While it does work just fine if you leave the new roll on the counter next to the sink. you run the risk of the toilet paper falling into the sink and getting wet, splashing or spitting on it when you’re brushing your teeth or dropping it onto the floor. Putting it on the spindle is easy: a) Grab the spindle and push one end to the other on the spring; b) Remove spindle and take old roll from it; c) Put new roll on spindle (I personally prefer that the toilet paper come over the top of the roll, but once you’re in your own place it’s really up to you); d) Replace spindle the same way you removed it.

3. Laundry. You know there are things you dry and things you hang up. Don’t wash them together. On second thought, go ahead. It will serve you right if you have to sort wet clothes and put some in the dryer and some in a basket to be hung up. That’s what you made me do since you learned how to turn on the washing machine.

4. Dishes. If you’re lucky enough to get a dishwasher, great! Just remember to rinse the dishes before putting them through the cycle. That is, unless you like tasting dried-on cheese that tastes like soap.

5. Garbage. When you’re making macaroni and cheese or warming up a can of Spaghetti-O’s, throw away or recycle the packaging. Don’t leave it on the counterĀ – I won’t be there to clean it up.

6. Call your mother. She worries about you.

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